Humans of Cheer

 Brandon Stanton’s Art Initiative Humans of New York is a collection of his findings as he goes around New York City and takes peoples pictures that he meets on the streets in the city.  After the photograph he talks to them for a minute.  The humanization of his work is so powerful, to see the collection of images really captivates me.  So this week we were asked to do our own response to Brandon's work.  I thought about it all week, becoming slightly obsessed with the idea.  Who would I find it had to be perfect I was searching as I was walking places.  Nothing had come to me until I was out of town this weekend judging a cheer and dance competition in Orlando.  First of all the world of cheer and dance is like a different universe a very unique collection of people.  When I was on a break I was heading to the concession stand when I noticed this gentleman.  Full blown wig, boa, skirt, leg warmers just casually walking around.  Now normally passing this guy you would be taken back.  But in the world of cheer and dance competition you are used to seeing a large display of team spirit.  Usually in the form of signs and sometimes moms of the cheerleaders, but commonly not the dads.  I smiled at him and he goes "you like my outfit" I said I actually do can I take your picture?  He said of course and flashed me his big smile.  I snapped a quick picture with my phone and told him thank you.  He ended up sharing with me the story behind the outfit.  He said that it wasn't a bet which is what most people think.  He then proceeded to tell me one of the most touching stories I have ever heard.
His wife passed away tragically from cancer, she was diagnosed and gone in 3 months.  They had one daughter who was 8 at the time.  He said it was the hardest time in his life.  He had no idea what to do, his wife had been the caretaker for their daughter and he was a working man.  When she died he didn't know what to do. His daughter had been cheerleading and loved it and his wife instructed him to be sure to let her keep cheering.  Before his wife passed he had never been to anything involved with his daughters cheerleading, they would travel on the weekends he would stay and golf.  After the death he encouraged his daughter to keep cheerleading, and she did.  It became something they bonded over.  Rather than staying late in the office or going for drinks with the guys after work he was rushing out of the office to make it to the 4:30 practice and bringing snacks for her at 6:30 then picking her up at 8:30.  He had no idea the work she put into the sport, nor had he ever appreciated all the work his wife had done as well.  As the competition season approached one of the moms from the cheerleading gym asked if he was going to the competition.  He said he remembers looking her dead in the face and having no clue what to say.  He did go to the competition.  He had no idea what was going on but when his daughters team got on stage he said he went crazy.  He felt like he was watching the Super Bowl.  His daughter is now 15 and cheerleading has become their lives together.  She hopes to pursue it in college and he will be right by her side.
After this interaction I really started to think about all the people we pass every day.  We have no idea about what is going on in their lives, what they have gone through. We maybe have a brush of a shoulder with them.  Today we barely even make eye contact because we are looking at our phones. I do this all the time, walk and look at my phone never taking time to look at my surroundings or fellow pedestrians around me.  As we walk through life I think the skills of eye contact and listening may be the most compassionate skills we can acquire.